Cover Letter for Job Application: Your Thoughts
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Hello
I would need some feedback. I am currently writing a letter to request to be hired again where I worked last year. However, I am having a bit of trouble phrasing my sentences and finding the right words.
Here is what I have so far:
*******
Dear Sir,
Having previously worked for you as a temporary employee last summer for about a month, I would like to reach out to you again.
I wish to work for you again. I really enjoyed my time last year; it was one of my first experiences in the workforce, and I greatly appreciated the atmosphere that prevailed there. I was also very interested in how the production line operates.
I will be available for the summer season starting Monday, July 23, possibly earlier depending on the dates of my oral exams (I am finishing my preparation for the entrance exams to the prestigious schools), and I would be very happy to renew this experience.
Awaiting a response that I hope will be positive, please accept, dear sir, the expression of my respectful sentiments.
X
*******
Thank you for letting me know what you think, what needs to be corrected, added, if it’s too short, too long, or any mistakes I might have missed...
I would need some feedback. I am currently writing a letter to request to be hired again where I worked last year. However, I am having a bit of trouble phrasing my sentences and finding the right words.
Here is what I have so far:
*******
Dear Sir,
Having previously worked for you as a temporary employee last summer for about a month, I would like to reach out to you again.
I wish to work for you again. I really enjoyed my time last year; it was one of my first experiences in the workforce, and I greatly appreciated the atmosphere that prevailed there. I was also very interested in how the production line operates.
I will be available for the summer season starting Monday, July 23, possibly earlier depending on the dates of my oral exams (I am finishing my preparation for the entrance exams to the prestigious schools), and I would be very happy to renew this experience.
Awaiting a response that I hope will be positive, please accept, dear sir, the expression of my respectful sentiments.
X
*******
Thank you for letting me know what you think, what needs to be corrected, added, if it’s too short, too long, or any mistakes I might have missed...
5 réponses
Hello qq,
Some modifications that seem important to me:
Sir,
Having already worked for you as a temp last summer for about a month, I would like to reach out to you again.
Having already worked for you as a temp last summer from ... to ..., in the position of ... (specify the position held), I would like to request to join your team once again.
You're not reaching out to a person, but you're reaching out to them for something or perhaps you're reaching out for something with that person, like a meeting for instance.
I would like to work for you again. Indeed, I really enjoyed myself last year,
It’s nice that you enjoyed yourself ;) but I believe you enjoyed the company, right?
it was one of my first experiences in the working world, and I really appreciated the atmosphere that prevailed there. I was also very interested in the workings of the production chain.
Indeed, I really enjoyed myself at your company, I appreciated the atmosphere that prevailed there, and I was very interested in the workings of the production chain.
I will be available for the summer season starting Monday, July 23, or even earlier depending on the dates of my oral exams (I am finishing my preparation for the entrance exams to the grandes écoles), and I would be very happy to renew this experience.
I will be available for the summer season starting Monday, July 23, or even earlier depending on the dates of my oral exams (preparation for entrance exams to the grandes écoles) and I will be very happy to renew this experience.
In anticipation of a response that I hope will be positive, please accept, sir, the expression of my respectful sentiments.
In anticipation of a response that I hope will be positive, I ask you to accept, sir, the expression of my respectful sentiments.
It’s you who is waiting, so you ask him to… blablabla. If you don't include anything before the polite formula, you can write: Please accept… blablabla
Good luck
Some modifications that seem important to me:
Sir,
Having already worked for you as a temp last summer for about a month, I would like to reach out to you again.
Having already worked for you as a temp last summer from ... to ..., in the position of ... (specify the position held), I would like to request to join your team once again.
You're not reaching out to a person, but you're reaching out to them for something or perhaps you're reaching out for something with that person, like a meeting for instance.
I would like to work for you again. Indeed, I really enjoyed myself last year,
It’s nice that you enjoyed yourself ;) but I believe you enjoyed the company, right?
it was one of my first experiences in the working world, and I really appreciated the atmosphere that prevailed there. I was also very interested in the workings of the production chain.
Indeed, I really enjoyed myself at your company, I appreciated the atmosphere that prevailed there, and I was very interested in the workings of the production chain.
I will be available for the summer season starting Monday, July 23, or even earlier depending on the dates of my oral exams (I am finishing my preparation for the entrance exams to the grandes écoles), and I would be very happy to renew this experience.
I will be available for the summer season starting Monday, July 23, or even earlier depending on the dates of my oral exams (preparation for entrance exams to the grandes écoles) and I will be very happy to renew this experience.
In anticipation of a response that I hope will be positive, please accept, sir, the expression of my respectful sentiments.
In anticipation of a response that I hope will be positive, I ask you to accept, sir, the expression of my respectful sentiments.
It’s you who is waiting, so you ask him to… blablabla. If you don't include anything before the polite formula, you can write: Please accept… blablabla
Good luck
Hello,
My son is looking for a job in the automotive sector, in assembly line or as a forklift operator, and we are struggling to write his cover letter. Could you please help us? Thank you.
Dear Sir,
Subject: Unsolicited application
I am pleased to submit my application for the position of (in the assembly line)… for any potential recruitment you might undertake.
Having gained several experiences through temporary work, I am looking for a stable job that would lead to a permanent contract.
By nature assertive, spontaneous, organized, and resilient to stress, I am accustomed to quickly learning to carry out the tasks assigned to me with calm and composure, experiences acquired through various temporary assignments.
Attached, you will find my resume which provides you with numerous indications regarding my skills and versatility.
Thank you in advance for the attention given to my application, and I ask you to accept,... the expression of my distinguished salutations.
My son is looking for a job in the automotive sector, in assembly line or as a forklift operator, and we are struggling to write his cover letter. Could you please help us? Thank you.
Dear Sir,
Subject: Unsolicited application
I am pleased to submit my application for the position of (in the assembly line)… for any potential recruitment you might undertake.
Having gained several experiences through temporary work, I am looking for a stable job that would lead to a permanent contract.
By nature assertive, spontaneous, organized, and resilient to stress, I am accustomed to quickly learning to carry out the tasks assigned to me with calm and composure, experiences acquired through various temporary assignments.
Attached, you will find my resume which provides you with numerous indications regarding my skills and versatility.
Thank you in advance for the attention given to my application, and I ask you to accept,... the expression of my distinguished salutations.
What a correction !!!!
Titipapounet is indeed inspired.
The correction is spot on. I would add 2 small points, but nothing too important:
_ Having already worked for you ... I would like to reach out to you again.
Please avoid using "again" twice in the text.
_ While waiting ... the expression of my respectful sentiments.
You are not waiting for anything, move forward. Tell them that you will contact them in two weeks to inquire about the status of your application (but better phrased).
And at the end, do not use "respectful sentiments," but "kind regards."
Titipapounet is indeed inspired.
The correction is spot on. I would add 2 small points, but nothing too important:
_ Having already worked for you ... I would like to reach out to you again.
Please avoid using "again" twice in the text.
_ While waiting ... the expression of my respectful sentiments.
You are not waiting for anything, move forward. Tell them that you will contact them in two weeks to inquire about the status of your application (but better phrased).
And at the end, do not use "respectful sentiments," but "kind regards."
Here is the translation:
---
Subject: Application for seasonal employment for summer 2007.
Dear Sir,
Having previously worked for you as a temporary employee last summer from July 26 to August 19, 2006, I would like to request to rejoin your team.
Indeed, I really enjoyed my time in your company; it was one of my first experiences in the workforce, I appreciated the atmosphere that prevailed there, and I was very interested in the functioning of the production line.
I am available for the summer season starting Monday, July 23, 2007, or even earlier depending on the dates of my exams (I am finishing my preparation for the entrance exams to the grandes écoles), and I would be very happy to repeat this experience.
Awaiting a response that I hope will be positive, I remain, dear Sir, yours sincerely.
X
---
---
Subject: Application for seasonal employment for summer 2007.
Dear Sir,
Having previously worked for you as a temporary employee last summer from July 26 to August 19, 2006, I would like to request to rejoin your team.
Indeed, I really enjoyed my time in your company; it was one of my first experiences in the workforce, I appreciated the atmosphere that prevailed there, and I was very interested in the functioning of the production line.
I am available for the summer season starting Monday, July 23, 2007, or even earlier depending on the dates of my exams (I am finishing my preparation for the entrance exams to the grandes écoles), and I would be very happy to repeat this experience.
Awaiting a response that I hope will be positive, I remain, dear Sir, yours sincerely.
X
---
Hello!
I just reread your letter, it's good but there are 3 points I'd like to mention:
_ While waiting ... to accept, sir, the expression ...
Capitalize the 'M' in 'Monsieur'.
_ Indeed, I really enjoyed my time in your company, ... production.
The sentence is too long, it spans three lines. Try to split it into 2.
_ Indeed, I really enjoyed my time in your company
I don't really think that's great. I would rather say that it was enriching by explaining why (assembly line, first experience...)
PS: it might be a good idea in this part to remind him what you did and why these activities pleased you (if you want to do the same thing). For example, teamwork, hands-on experience, autonomy, related to your training, creativity, manual work, solving technical problems... You have a choice.
I just reread your letter, it's good but there are 3 points I'd like to mention:
_ While waiting ... to accept, sir, the expression ...
Capitalize the 'M' in 'Monsieur'.
_ Indeed, I really enjoyed my time in your company, ... production.
The sentence is too long, it spans three lines. Try to split it into 2.
_ Indeed, I really enjoyed my time in your company
I don't really think that's great. I would rather say that it was enriching by explaining why (assembly line, first experience...)
PS: it might be a good idea in this part to remind him what you did and why these activities pleased you (if you want to do the same thing). For example, teamwork, hands-on experience, autonomy, related to your training, creativity, manual work, solving technical problems... You have a choice.